The Drunk at 11AM party girls

It was Sunday morning, around 10am.  I had just woken up from a night of drinking-  I threw a birthday party at my apartment, and had the tell tale headache of a good night.  I made myself some real greasy bacon, eggs, and some coffee to get myself back together.  I turned on Lyft around 10:45, as I usually do when i'm at my apartment with nothing to do.  I get a ping around 11, jump into some clothes and get out the door.  I drive to an apartment complex about ten minutes away, on street road for those of you familiar with Philadelphia suburbs.  Two girls start walking up to my car, and I should have known something was up when I saw that they were wearing sunglasses on an overcast day.  They get in and greet me too enthusiastically, and request that I put on some "hardcore rap".  I tell them that I have an aux cord that they can use to put anything they want on.  They light up, and start bickering about whether they should put on Lil Wayne or Mac Miller.  This is when I notice a strong smell of liqour in the air-  I started to panic a little bit, because people were drinking in my car the night before, and I thought that it could be lingering from that.  My fears subsided when one of the girls gets in my face, close enough for me to smell the tequila on her breath, and lets me know that "were putting on lil wayne!".  Great! and we were off to Philly.  We were on 95, and "We be steady mobbing" just got on.  As lil wayne was rapping about how he has so many bathrooms that he could shit all day, one of the girls said " I hope this isn't, like, offensive to you."  Not at all, I'm not one to be easily offended.

Further up the highway, I notice one of the girls has gotten out of her seat.  She has her phone in her hand.  She leans over the passenger seat, and at this point is trying to discreetly take a selfy with me in the background.  By "discreetly"  I mean she was about 6 inches away from me, with her arm practically around me.  Advice for passengers- just ask , so you don't look like an idiot.

We get into the city! Drunk selfie girl starts complaining about how dirty the city is, and how "if they just, like, cleaned it more it would't be like this."  Not sure why shes not on the city council.  I drop them off on Colombus Boulevard.  12pm.  My final thought- I think it might be time for a drink.